Success

They're playing dress-ups. That's my first thought as I look down the row at my friends who are immaculately dressed, having just come from work. Their clothes are perfectly pressed and their shoes look like a pair of Mum's old ones that made their way into our dress-ups box, only these ones aren't scuffed and worn and they look a whole lot more expensive. I push this thought aside and try to tune in to their conversation. It's noisy, and I only pick up snippets.

“If they offer me a position in Auckland I'll have to be there in three weeks.”

“My new position is a huge step up from what I've been doing, and has a significant salary increase.”

“After a year or so it's time to start moving up.”

Surely this is just a game of pretend, of make-believe. It's no different to the way we'd play house when we were younger. We'd spend a couple of hours dressing up in so called work clothes pretending to be Very Important People. Soon enough we'd get bored and pack up, preferring to play some other game. Maybe we'd be superheroes this time.

I look down at my own work clothes, jeans and chucks, and I'm hit once again with the realisation that this isn't a game anymore. This is the real world that my friends live in now, but I don't feel like I belong here. Everyone seems to have jumped onto the bottom rung of a corporate ladder and fixed their eyes firmly on the top. They've got a career and life mapped out, while I still don't have a clue. I like my job and I have plenty of other things to keep me busy, but I have more and more moments when all I can think is crap, I'm gonna die, what am I doing – nothing – crap.

Maybe God just hasn't noticed that I've been left behind. I set about making smoke signals, sending out an SOS. He meets me, and I swear I can hear Him laugh. Not in a mean way, but in the way a parent laughs when a small child unwittingly does something funny. 'I don't see a problem here.'

'I want what they have!' I gesture wildly. 'The well mapped plans! Security, certainty, success!'

'What would you do with a plan if I gave it to you?' He asks.

I blink. 'Follow it, of course.'

'Ah. Good. Keep at it then.'

'I will,' I counter, 'just as soon as you give me the plan.'

'I've already given it to you', He says, adding kindly 'but perhaps you've misplaced it. Maybe this will help you remember.' Then he hands me a picture. I look at it, and see that it's a photo I took on a recent trip to Farewell Spit.

'Oh, I remember this!'

'I should hope so. It's only been a month.'

'Man, what a time that was! Crossing from one beach to the other was kind of scary. Those DOC guys have odd ideas about what a 'marked trail' is. Going from marker to marker is tricky when you can't even see them. I was especially worried when there was that huge swamp in the way, but it turned out okay.'

'You know', He tells me, 'I actually think DOC's trail marking is rather good. You could almost say that they've modelled it on the way I mark a trail.'

'Why's that?' I ask.

'I've got a destination in mind', he tells me mysteriously, 'but I prefer to show it to you piece by piece. It's too much to cope with otherwise. If I showed you all my plans you'd be too overwhelmed to do anything about them. They'd seem too big, too unbelieveable, and they may not make any logical sense. And then where would we be? But if I show you small pieces you can generally work out how to get there. Just trust me that I know the rest of the way.

'Why am I stuck at a marker then, when everyone else goes on ahead? I've done the school thing, the uni thing, but got stuck after the finding a job thing.'

'You're not stuck at a marker if you're following me. But you think that to be successful you go to school, go to uni, get a job, then move up the ladder at a speed directly related to how many years you spent at uni and the number of certificates you collected while doing so, right?'

It sounds a bit silly when He spells it out, so I try to change the subject. 'Something like that, and hey – you know how you're really powerful and that – couldn't you have directed me to choose a different study area? Something that would be a little more applicable to the current job market than Art History and medieval languages?'

He's doing that my child is being unintentionally hilarious laugh again. 'I don't really work like that. Let me ask you something. Did you enjoy what you studied?'

'Absolutely.'

'And would you have enjoyed studying law or commerce?'

'Absolutely not.'

'Or IT?'

'I wouldn't have a clue where to start.'

'Exactly. You see, I give people different gifts.'

'Oh, true, I've read that somewhere.'

'I should hope so. It's in that best-selling book I wrote. Anyway, the thing is, I love to give my children gifts. And I get great pleasure from seeing them use them as best they can. If you use the gifts and opportunities that I give you to the best of your ability, then you're succesful. For some people that does mean climbing a corporate ladder, for others it doesn't. I'm more concerned with whether you're serving me.'

The treasures in heaven verse comes to mind. 'Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust desroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up or yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.'

It's about kingdom building, and working for God – doing things that will make a forever difference, whatever that looks like and whether it seems quite ordinary or crazy and nonsensical.

God holds out his hand, a father to a child. 'I'm off to change the world. Are you coming with me?'




- Isabel
(Views expressed are my own and do not necessarily represent those of GBNZ)